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Tag Archives: Women
I’m always curious about my and other people’s spending habits (what? I’m NOSY!), and it’s interesting to learn what people spent in the past.
In the 1930s, there was a basic wardrobe list that every woman could follow, and every year would have cost approximately $191.81 for clothing and $46.21 for upkeep and personal care.
If we add inflation to today’s 2012 dollar*, it would mean: $2516.55 for clothes and $606.27 for personal care, which I am assuming includes haircuts, and spa-anything.
*$1.00 in 1930 had the same buying power as $13.12 in 2012. Annual inflation over this period was 3.19%.
That means you could expect to spend about $209.71 for clothes per month, and $50.52 for personal care.
That actually sounds quite reasonable. More reasonable than MY spending, anyway.
A BASIC WOMEN’S WORKING WARDROBE IN NEW YORK CITY IN 1937
(Source: ‘Clothing’ (Latzke and Quinlan, 1940))
Note: This wardrobe would have been updated each year, so 8 dresses would turn into a bit more every year if the dresses didn’t fray or wear out.
Medium quality fur-trimmed coat, every third year
Wool spring coat, every other year
4 felt hats, two heavy, two light
- 2 cotton, for summer street wear
- 4 rayon, 3 fair quality, one inexpensive
- 1 wool dress, medium
- 1 rayon party dress
1 wool skirt
1 sweater, every other year
1 smock (I put an apron here)
- 2 undervests (rayon) (Used tank tops instead)
- 3 knit rayon bloomers
- 2 panties, 1 rayon, 1 silk
- 4 slips, 3 rayon, 1 silk
- 2 corsets or girdles
- 3 brassières
- 3 nightgowns, 1 cotton, 1 rayon, 1 cotton flannel
Flannel bathrobe (every 3 yrs.)
Rayon kimono, every other year
20 pairs medium silk stockings (I didn’t put all 20 in here)
- 2 pairs medium quality street shoes
- 1 pair medium quality dress shoes
- 1 pair evening slippers, every other year
- 1 pair inexpensive white shoes
Rubbers 1 pair every other year
Overshoes 1 pair every other year (I took some liberty here, not knowing what overshoes are…)
House slippers 1 pair every other year
Umbrella, every other year
Raincoat, every 3 years
3 pairs gloves, 1 leather, 1 fabric
3 handbags at $1 each (or fewer and better)
Via shared by reader ES
MODERN TIMES HAVE CHANGED FOR A FEW THINGS
I don’t think anyone owns or wears bloomers, or stockings to require 20 pairs of medium silk stockings, nor do we wear corsets, girdles on a regular basis.
We also do more than just take dictation or calls as secretaries these days. Women are in what were traditionally men’s roles in the past.
Wardrobe basics I see missing for me in there are:
- 1 suit — Just for the rare interview to be pulled out and dusted off
- Jeans — Skinny, bootcut
- Pants — Cropped legs (just an inch or two above the ankle)
- Work pants
- More work shoes — At least one other pair
- Work blouses
- At least another sweater or two
My basic minimalist wardrobe would look more like this, if I had to pick 20-items:
Images above all created via Polyvore
What do you think? Anything missing in there for you?
Bloomberg came out with an AMAZING tool that pretty much tracks every billionaire in the world.
(As if we weren’t already nosy and annoying enough for them.)
It comes in cartoon head form and shows the net worth rankings of each billionaire in the world:
You can even scroll over the head to see their exact net worth. I chose Liliane Bettencourt of L’Oreal, who is the richest woman in France:
Or click on their head for a short profile:
You can also sort by gender, and look at the list of all the women billionaires for instance:
Or look at them all in a chart:
You can play around with it here.
I am noticing an odd trend in my circle. It’s tiny and not indicative of all my awesome friends, but it’s enough to make me whip my head around when I hear it.
A friend I have, started pursuing an MBA so that she wouldn’t have to work in the real world any more (she worked for a year and a half.)
Before getting accepted into a college for said MBA, she took a year and a half off, and traveled on her husband’s dime around the world (with him, of course).
Then she got her MBA, and decided she really didn’t want to work.
What did she do? She got pregnant.
Yes, she seriously told me all of the above and why she has a cute little baby boy right now.
She told me she thought it would also make sense to wait a few more years as a stay-at-home mom, and either take a PhD to avoid working, or have another kid.
I had to pick my mouth up off the floor at that.
Luckily, we were talking on the phone and not Skyping, so she couldn’t see the look on my face.
BF’s friend, just recently told us that his girlfriend whom he refuses to marry (French people aren’t hot on marriage in general), is getting in vitro fertilization soon to have a baby (or two, as twins are common!).
I oohed and aaahed over having a baby (or babies), and thinking of all the wonderful things (ignoring the searing, burned-alive-pain of childbirth), a baby or two would bring for the both of them, and how great it would be for them.
I was already thinking of their future and cute moments like this one: Twin Baby Girls Rock out to their Daddy’s Guitar
He gave me a strange look and clarified that he wasn’t too chuffed at the idea of having a kid (he could do without one, he said), but she had flat out said she only wanted a baby so she could stop working.
The worst of it?
He’s actually okay with all that… although ‘resigned’ is the word I’d describe him, but for the life of me, I don’t know why he doesn’t just tell her to get out of his house where he pays for EVERYTHING, even though she works a few days a month here and there, and doesn’t spend any money except on herself.
To clarify, she hasn’t really worked her whole life, so she’s not used to it. Lame excuse, I know.
She grew up spoiled, her parents cut her off from the fortune, and she now lives on her boyfriend’s dime, and I’m fairly sure it’s to “secure” him so he doesn’t leave her, and to use the grandchild as a bargaining chip with her parents to get back into the will, all along with not having to work any longer for the rest of her life.
Women have come so far since getting the right to vote, fairer/less sexist treatment in the workplace, and then you hear of 2 bad apples who pretty much set back huge chunks of what we’ve fought for so far.
It is one thing to be a stay-at-home mom, to really enjoy it and to WANT to be a SAHM who is the head of the household and a true supportive half in the relationship.
It’s another thing altogether to state bluntly that you want to quit working forever, and having a baby is the only solution.
It’s like an Early Retirement Card that will burp, poop and cry for the first 5 years of its life, and then possibly disappoint you because you’ve heaped too much on them in terms of expectations.
Me, I am not going to quit my plum career.
I want kids, but I want my own adult life too, and I do NOT choose being a SAHM. I think I’d tear my hair out and murder Dora the Explorer in my dreams.
You heard it here first.
Something I’ve noticed time and time again at home, or when I travel abroad is when I am with BF, I am not addressed as a person.
He’s the one that gets the: How are you doing today, sir?, and I get jack squat.
This doesn’t happen all the time, but it happens enough for me to notice that I am not acknowledged in about 20% of the situations I’m in.
Or when I reply to them when they say vaguely: How are you doing today?, they’re surprised I opened my mouth to say anything. Or when BF defers to me.
Of course, this happens in stores and areas that are more geared towards the male race, but it has happened in banks as well, when we went in together to figure out what kind of investing options there were at a particular bank.
He was addressed formally with a handshake and everything, and I was just the decoration.
He was the one they talked to, until I quietly asked what the minimum was for a particular investing account.
When they told me $100,000 in a slightly condescending manner, I just asked if I had more money invested, if it would mean better terms for me.
They were taken slightly aback, but their attitude changed to one of bemusement.
(I feel like we still live in the Mad Men age, to some extent)
It even happened at the border when we were thoroughly questioned, and he was grilled 10X more than I was about consulting, because they assumed I was his assistant secretary, but not a “real” consultant who had any power.
I was too young for them to have any brains, and add on top that I’m a woman, and they couldn’t imagine another scenario.
It amuses me at the same time that it bothers me slightly.
Even though I am able to make the same salary as BF who is a decade older than I am, and even though I have significant assets for my age, it doesn’t matter when everyday people don’t know that and treat me as though I’m some insignificant partner.
They think he has all the money and power in the relationship, when in fact, we’re equals in that respect, even if I am 10 years younger.
WOMEN GO THROUGH THIS ON A DAILY BASIS
It made me think that this is probably not a singular phenomenon, and many women must go through the same marginalization by being treated differently just because they’re women.
I’ve read plenty of stories in PF books about how millionaire women are underestimated because they’re women, and sadly enough, it doesn’t surprise me (but it does make me laugh when it results in a favourable outcome, when they play with those misconceptions).
It doesn’t surprise me that women’s voices are still not heard as loudly as men’s in elections, and that we still don’t have a woman President (USA) or Prime Minister (Canada), and the closest that Canada got was with Kim Campbell, but in the U.S., I haven’t heard a single peep from any woman wanting to even run.
It’s all men making the decisions and calling the shots.
A lot of it, is we are still clinging to old values — men lead, women follow — and women are just not doing their part in stepping up to the plate to seize the crown.
What we can do in our daily lives, is consider if the way we treat women is equal, in the sense that it disregards their gender.
It means an eye for an eye, and a tooth for a tooth.
If a woman is rude, tell her off the same way you’d tell a man off. It goes both ways.
The last point would be to vote or STFU, and vote with your money.
Don’t give money to businesses who don’t treat you well or don’t treat others well, whether you are a man or a woman.
Women, have you ever felt this way as a woman?
As a man, have you ever noticed it?
No, I’m not trying to sell you some vegetarian or vegan diet.
Research has shown that the more fruits and vegetables you eat, the healthier you look and the more attractive you become to others.
I will note that they only carried it out on Caucasians and Asians, but that’s not to say it doesn’t help other skin colours.
People who increased their intake were rated more attractive after just six weeks, researchers found.
Scientists at St Andrews University monitored the food consumption of 35 people and took pictures of them over this period.
Eating an average of 2.9 more portions of fruit and vegetables a day made them look healthier when rated by others at the end of the study, while an extra 3.3 portions enhanced their attractiveness.
That means 6.2 portions of fruits and vegetables should do it.
Your skin changes into a more attractive colour, and allows your skin to take on a rosy glow.
It’s like REAL LIVE photoshopping!
This glow also makes men more attractive to women, which will help if you aren’t a millionaire (What? The ability to make and keep money is always attractive in a partner.)
BEST FRUITS AND VEGETABLES TO EAT
Anything with lycopene in it, like tomatoes and red peppers.
One tomato or one red pepper is considered 1 serving.
Anything with beta-carotene in it, like carrots, broccoli, squash and spinach.
One carrot is one serving (or 10 baby carrots worth, which aren’t REAL carrots in my opinion, as they’re pretty tasteless), or half a cup of squash.
Spinach should be half a cup, or a good, large handful.
Anything with polyphenols in it, like apples, blueberries and cherries (causes blood to rush to your face).
One apple is one serving, the rest should be half a cup.
We women spend a lot of money on beauty to the tune of $7 BILLION dollars a year, or $100 a month on things like makeup and toiletries. (Source: YWCA Report “Beauty at any cost”).
That above $100 a month also includes things like surgery, Botox and so on, so it’s even more embarrassing if I were to post my personal spending numbers from previous years:
- 2011 = $1385.57 or $115.46 a month
- 2010 = $1287.40 or $107.28 a month
- 2009 = $411.65 or $34.40 a month
I spend around and slightly MORE than the average, and I don’t get any surgery or injections whatsoever!
Obviously starting in 2010, I started to get more into makeup, and all of my eyeliners, eyeshadows, blushes and brushes can attest to that.
I also started buying higher end products that were more natural like Josie Maran, Tarte and Korres for my face.
But did I really need to spend all that money?
Not in the SLIGHTEST!
I could have easily done with just 4 eyeliners instead of the 15+ I own, 2 blushes and so on. The problem arises from any of the following:
- Wanting to try the newest products (new! improved! magical!)
- Wanting to try new colours (how would this gel blush look on me?)
- Wanting to switch and try all the options until you decide on your ‘Holy Grail’
- Hearing recommendations from beauty bloggers
- Your skin changing and requiring different things (my skin has gotten drier since I was a teen)
In the end, until I find what I really want to buy and use regularly, I will keep trying and buying different products, but it can be hard to wait until something totally disappears before buying something else to try.
I find makeup fun, but not something I have to do on a daily basis.
Au naturel Photoshopped beauty doesn’t really exist
Know how people (usually guys) say: “Oh but So-and-So looks so natural, she doesn’t need makeup! Why can’t you be like that?”
Yeah. Right. Unless they were born with perfect, pore-less, even-toned complexions, every girl wears just a smidgen of makeup, even if it’s concealer under the eyes.
I seriously DO look better with a bit of makeup on, and I am not afraid to say that, even if loved ones protest!
I am hearing even from the most fresh-faced girls I know, that they wear a ton of makeup! At the very least, they pluck their eyebrows and shade them in before leaving the house.
That taken into account, I have no qualms with leaving the house with nothing but sunscreen on, even if I know I don’t look my best. It isn’t a kind of mental hang-up where I need to wear false eyelashes and a full face of makeup or else I feel like I’m hideous — on the contrary, I don’t feel ugly without makeup, I just know I look younger and less polished.
A little makeup can make you look more professional
I know concealer, eyeliner, mascara, sheer coloured lip balm and a smidgen of foundation on my dark spots, make me look 100% better. I know it makes me look more professional, and I even feel more professional with a little bit of makeup on and people respond better to me.
Surprisingly, it really does make a difference at work if you go truly barefaced or not, sad to say.
Nancy Etcoff, the study’s lead author and associate researcher at Massachusetts General Hospital told ABC news that [.....]
‘The women were judged as more competent, likeable, attractive and trustworthy.’
[.....] but trustworthiness – or honesty – soon suffered as cosmetic looks became heavier.
‘When they got to the more dramatic make-up looks, people saw them as equally likeable and much more attractive and competent, but less trustworthy,’ comments Etcoff to the news site.
So wear a little makeup to look polished but natural, and leave the super bright eyeshadows and eyeliners, thick concealer or foundation and huge false eyelashes at home.
You can also read Erotic Capital – Power in the Boardroom by Catherine Hakim, which I highly recommend because it tells the truth about having to look your best, because it matters when you work.
All in all, a little makeup helps, and you don’t need to own a lot to look more polished. I know it’s a double standard, but it also helps that I enjoy the act and idea of makeup as well.
What about you?
Absolutely Fobulous posted a great video on this, about Asian guys getting perplexed as to why Caucasian girls don’t date them in the same numbers as Asian girls date Caucasian guys.
NOT 100% CULTURAL, I THINK
The video says it’s because it’s cultural.
They can’t understand the things each other grew up with, and what they experienced because it’s so different.
Even the way they date and what they look for in the opposite sex is different — Chairman Mao had something to say about this:
But I’m going to come right out and say that this is probably not 100% of the truth.
I mean, look at all the foreign guys in general, ones from Europe for instance.
Bridget, I’m looking at you!, even though you are 50% German
“The reality that I find every German man between the ages of 20 and 40 attractive. Especially when they’re walking around Frankfurt in their gorgeous business suits looking so… German. “
They have accents, different cultural experiences and don’t grow up in the same environments either.
They have insane tests like in Asia, far, FAR harder than what I’ve ever experienced here, and when they talk about not having boyfriends or girlfriends JUST SO they can study to get into the best schools, I get this clueless look on my face, tinged with fear for their schooling system.
Anyway, if culture was the case, it doesn’t explain the phenomenal amount of Asian girls (North-American-born or otherwise), dating Caucasian men in droves.
DEPENDS ON WHO YOU GREW UP WITH TOO
One of the factors not mentioned, is simply that North American girls in general, are attracted to who they’ve grown up with — namely, Caucasian guys.
If they grew up with Asian guys, these girls would probably be attracted to them too.
Perhaps if Caucasian women went to Asia to study, it’d be the reverse.
…OR MAYBE IT’S THE SEXES
Maybe guys are just less picky in general and are really more open to dating all types as long as they are living, breathing, and most importantly — have boobs and girly curves
(That last crack was for you, Nelson)
Thoughts on interracial dating?
Came across this great quote today by Bill Gates*.
(As I didn’t personally hear it, I am assuming the quote and the circumstances were true, but even if they weren’t, the quote still rings true for me and is something I believe.)
WE HAD THE SAME ATTITUDES ABOUT WOMEN NOT SO LONG AGO!
Before the World Wars, women stayed at home, cooked, cleaned and didn’t have careers.
It wasn’t until all the men went to war, that women had to step in, roll up their sleeves and work.
Some went back to what they were doing before, others decided they liked working and kept doing it, albeit in ‘safe’ jobs like being a secretary and fighting to be recognized as an equal in the workplace (as a young woman professional, I thank you!).
It made me wonder: If there weren’t any World Wars, would women have been given the opportunity to crack that barrier? How long would it have taken?
Maybe we would have been in the same position as in the countries we now think are ‘backwards’ and not as progressive.
Note: I absolutely acknowledge that tradition and religion plays a big part, so there’s no question that it’s not a matter of trying to preach, be bossy and educate the so-called uneducated to get them to change to what we think is the right way.
Those countries are full of extremely educated people who have a different mentality and outlook on the world.
It’s more that if the culture dictates certain rules and you want to stay in that culture with the rest of your family and friends, you have to follow those rules.
I understand that completely, having known many girls who have chosen that route, even if I would have never chosen that kind of life for myself.
Back to us in North America (and even parts of Europe).
WOMEN EARN LESS, PERIOD.
There is still a lingering, prevailing attitude that women are not as good as men in positions that require technical knowledge/skill and power:
- Any executive position
- Professional chefs
I am not saying that if you’re in Advertising or Human Resource management that you’re not useful or that you don’t have skills.
I am saying that as a society, we don’t seem to value those kinds of creative professions as highly as the ones that require technical know-how, and it shows in the salaries.
If as a society, we thought that young girls and women could be fantastic assets in those areas, why are women gravitating towards areas that don’t seem technically-inclined?
They’re being pushed towards those professions, unconsciously encouraged to take appropriate jobs and perhaps told from a young age that ‘girls are bad at math and science, so giggle a lot and ask for help from boys‘.
Check out this survey by Payscale – Do men really earn more than women:
Click on the image to enlarge
As a society, we believe that the money comes with the skill and difficulty of the job.
I am not going to get into a discussion of whether or not school teachers or nurses don’t help society (I DO NOT BELIEVE THAT), but this is just an example of why women earn less.
We gravitate towards jobs that don’t pay as much.
We aren’t encouraged to think and stand up for ourselves.
We aren’t taught that there is no ‘girls or boys’ in terms of abilities, there are just people.
We are unconsciously putting women down all the time (even as fellow women!) because of jealousy, pettiness and whatever else comes with women hating other women.
We (sometimes) assume a man is better in a job than a woman (sad, but true).
These are all factors in women earning less in the workplace. The good news is that we’re improving, but it has to change with the way we treat and talk to young girls and women.
What do you think?
I’ve always been curious about why there are so many great, single women out there looking for love, but not being able to find it (or only finding duds!)
When I mention this, people tell me that it’s because they’re high-maintenance or too choosy, which is the reason why they basically choose to be single.
Others, cite that it’s because the women are too successful (career-wise and financially), too intelligent and therefore too intimidating to men in general.
What does high maintenance mean?
People to me, who are high maintenance, are some or all of the following:
- always thinking of themselves (selfish)
- always assuming they will get their way 100% of the time
- not financially independent & secure to pay their way
- expecting others to do everything for them & pay for everything to boot
- always taking, never giving
- spending money they don’t have or haven’t earned themselves
- spending far, FAR beyond their or other people’s means
You will notice that I haven’t written: likes to shop and wear nice clothes.
If that were the case, I’m high maintenance!
Not all women who like to shop and wear nice things, are necessarily high maintenance.
If they have maxed out their retirement funds, saved a substantial amount of money, and continue to reach goals like saving a good portion of their income, then they should be able to reasonably enjoy their success, even if it seems frivolous to others.
These women have priorities, and they make choices about how they spend their cash.
What do men want?
Meg of World of Wealth had written a post entitled: I’m single, but I’m not picky or high maintenance.
…nearly half of all working wives bring home more bacon than their husbands, and that single women under 33 are out-earning their male counterparts.
These factors and others are affecting the courtship and marriage dance in complicated ways. The end result though is that more women are staying single and those who do marry are doing it later and later.
With both sexes earning plenty of money and remaining unattached – while crafting their own fun instant gratification lifestyles – well into their 20s and 30s, there is less pressure to wed all around.
I was struck by these two responses (presumably from men), which basically says that women do not receive a bonus or a premium on the dating market for being intelligent and successful.
They receive bonuses if they are young, fertile, beautiful and feminine:
Are women too intelligent and successful for men?
There is a grain of truth in what those guys are saying above: a smart, successful, attractive man is a great catch for a woman, but the reverse is not necessarily true if the woman outpaces the man in terms of earning power.
Men who are successful also want women who are successful because they don’t want to be worried about their wives not being able to hold their own in their social and professional circles.
Just because SOME men focus on ‘paying for youth and attractiveness’, it doesn’t mean that other men don’t value personality, intelligence and success.
One such couple, is the guy who’s a doctor and the girl who’s a dentist. In the past 5 years, she’s pulled in more money than he has, by a milestone (he’s still in residency).
Another couple, is a trader who married a woman who analyzes statistics. She makes more money than he does, and is in far more demand career-wise.
Besides, beauty fades, but personality and brains last forever.
I can’t imagine settling down for the rest of my life with someone who I liked to stare at and ogle, but was unable to hold a decent conversation with.
Why are women still single then?
Honestly, because some of them choose to be.
It may really be that those guys up there are making valid points for SOME women, but not for all.
If smart girls have dated guys and still haven’t really clicked or found anyone, then they’re choosing to stay single rather than be with someone they’re not 100% happy with, especially once you start working.
The pool definitely gets a lot smaller after college, and that is no joke.
Everyone has already been paired off like animals on Noah’s Ark by the time the last year rolls around, and within the next 5 years you hear a flurry of engagements, weddings, and even babies popping out in record time.
People you meet at work, are not necessarily people you can or would want to date. I was very lucky, but generally speaking, the prospects are not that hot.
I wouldn’t stop looking if I was single, and if it takes me until the age of 45 to find someone I could really share my life with, I’d rather wait until then and NOT settle.