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Tag Archives: Thoughts
The Meaning of Life is to Live in the Now
Do you ever wonder what the point of all this is? What the purpose of our lives are?
Personally, I believe we all have a purpose in life, and that’s to live.
Breathing in one breath and out, sleeping, eating, waking, and other bodily functions.
That’s living at its core if you think about it from a purely physical standpoint.
Ah but there’s more! The emotional.
Our purpose as human beings is really not to hoard money like some Scrooge, but end up all alone (perhaps divorced) and regretting all the moments you missed out in life because you were sitting on your great big pile of money.
I know, it sounds so strange with a PF blogger saying this, but it really isn’t the whole point or motivation of why I save money.
Our only purpose is to live in the Today, and in the Now.
I’ve already long accepted that I set my own little human-sized goals to reach $250,000 in net worth, and eventually a million before I retire, but ultimately, it is actually an insignificant accomplishment if I were to drop dead the day before I go to use that money.
But wait — it’s also not an excuse I can use to say:
Hey living in the Now means I get to go on a big shopping spree like the world is about to end tomorrow.
I still have to consider and plan carefully for the other very real possibility — that I will live beyond my retirement age, and perhaps well into my 90s.
IT’S NOT DEPRESSING IF YOU ALREADY DO WHAT YOU WANT
So is this depressing that you would have to save your whole life, but then imagine you die before you get to use that money?
It isn’t to me, because I’m already doing what I want to do today, and that includes saving enough for my (high) probability of living well into my 90s.
I couldn’t imagine a happier overall existence for myself, all things considered.
Sure, some days really suck and I wish things didn’t happen, but it’s just one day in the grand scheme of my life.
It’s like saying you’re angry for 3 seconds because you didn’t have any milk for your tea this morning, and it ruined your entire WEEK.
Now doesn’t that sound ridiculous?
Exactly.
PEOPLE SPEND THEIR WHOLE LIVES WAITING FOR THEIR LIVES TO BEGIN
The other day BF and I sat around talking about what happens after people win the lottery.
I won’t bore you with the details, but we came to the conclusion that many people probably spend their whole lives:
- saving
- spending
- going into debt
- dreaming of hitting it big in the lottery
…all so that they can finally start living their dream life.
Reality Check: You won’t get another life.
This is already YOUR DREAM LIFE that you have been dealt with, and the longer you put it off, the longer your Older Self will regret it.
The writing is on the wall. Photograph I took in the Beijing Museum of old Chinese characters.
Seeing as the odds of winning the lottery are extremely slim (it’s so slim, I can’t even see it), it’s sad to imagine that we’re all putting what we want to do on hold before we can start doing what we want.
All because of money? How ridiculous is that?
You can change your situation, because it’s YOUR life and you are in control.
Start budgeting, track your expenses, and get your ass into gear to do what it takes.
Or if you tell yourself: I’d love more free time so I can travel, and read books which is why I work so hard, so that I can have a secure financial future to do those things.
Are you kidding me right now? Go read a book NOW.
You’re probably wasting time reading this blog when you could be immersed in your dream activity, instead of waiting for the right or the best time to do it.
WHAT WOULD MORE MONEY CHANGE FOR ANYONE?
Then we turned it back onto ourselves as a self-reflection after we thought about people who win the lottery:
What would we do if we won the lottery?
BF said he’d have grand plans for that cash, and it would involve…… wait for it…. putting it into the bank and waiting for the best day to use it.
O_o
Not only is it extremely boring as a grand plan, but I realized that I would do exactly the same thing.
o_O
So then we asked:
What’s the best day then, to use the money?
For that, we had no answer.
Most people would quit, and find that to be the “dream of a lifetime”, but I can tell you that from my past 3 years, there’s no way I’d go back to just sitting around all day long, doing jack squat, and being bored out of my skull.
Quitting your job or having a job where you don’t need to work a lot, and doing NOTHING ALL DAY is not all it’s cracked up to be.
It really isn’t.
I for one, am extremely excited to go back to work, no matter how politically-incorrect that may sound.
I am excited to challenge my brain again, make money (yes, it gives me great satisfaction to make a lot of money), and to have something to fill the empty hours of the day of what I have as a life.
So then we talked about perhaps opening a business.
Or doing something that would occupy our time and our empty hours that we’d enjoy.
Open a restaurant. No, too much work, and it’s hot in there.
Okay, open a store.
A business. But selling what? What could we sell??
We sat that racking our brains for a good half hour of ideas before I said:
But if we wanted to do something other than what we’re doing now…
… shouldn’t we go and do it today so that we’re happy NOW?
And that ended the discussion because we realized that we are already doing what we want to do with our lives.
I ONLY HAVE ONE THING I WANT TO DO: VISIT JAPAN
I only have ONE thing on my list for the rest of my life, and it’s to visit Japan.
I know everyone tells me that the radiation is not a problem, and I even agree with reading the studies (rationally speaking). I KNOW I just have to stick to Tokyo and other areas far away from the radiation…
….but I’m a very young Worrying Wendy, I don’t want to screw my chances of living to a long ripe age just because I can’t wait 20 years or so to go see a country.
Nor do I want to screw my chances of not being able to have kids.
Or worse, passing anything toxic on to them.
In addition, I’ll be closer to death (theoretically speaking), and radiation won’t be that much of an issue for me by that time.
But it is something I get to look forward to when I get older. I almost can’t wait for 20 years to pass!
SO ASK YOURSELF:
ARE YOU LIVING THE LIFE YOU WANT TO LIVE, TODAY?
WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?
The Big Bad Wolf: Outsourcing and how it affects the job market
We can all agree that no one seems to like outsourcing.
Outsourcing to China? Shame on you for not protecting American jobs!
Outsourcing to India? Double curses on you and your family!
Outsourcing, jobs, immigrants and how it affects us has been on my mind lately from reading Forbes, listening to Obama and Romney battle it out and seeing people’s reactions to the Olympics when non-citizens of that country, play for that country’s team.
1. People (and companies) make individual, economic choices everyday
When you go to a store, and you see a jacket for $100, and a similar looking one for $50, which one are you going to buy?
Will you care enough to pay $50 more just because one says “Made in the U.S.A.”?
Perhaps you would out of a strong sense of patriotism, but many people struggling with budget concerns, wouldn’t. They’d probably close a blind eye to that tag, and buy the $50 jacket.
Companies, as they are run by humans, think the same way and have their own budgets to worry about.
Why would they want to pay 100% more for raw materials if it can be purchased for much cheaper to give them a better profit margin?
2. Companies play on such patriotism and are sneaky S.O.B.s
To add insult to injury, companies even PLAY on such strong, patriotic feelings by making tags that say “Made in the U.S.A.”, when in fact everything in that product was produced in countries like Indonesia, China or Romania, but only the assembly and/or packaging was done in the U.S.A.
This gives them the legal right to put that tag on there that it’s “Made in the U.S.A.”
I do rather enjoy buying things from independents rather than big box retailers, but even I have a limit.
3. Is it a company or the government’s duty to hand you a job?
I am most likely (okay DEFINITELY) going to get burned for this, but I’ll say it anyway: Is it really the company or the government’s problem to find a job for you?
Let me lay out my logic before you come at me with your pitchfork.
I always feel like as a Western society, we have this mentality of: I Deserve.
“I deserved that job over her.”
“I deserve that promotion, because I’ve been here longer and I’m louder.”
“I deserve that job because I’m a citizen of this country.”
“I deserve that job because I am EDUCATED. I went to college to get a [insert unwanted] degree for goodness sake and now I’m thousands in debt. Society owes me.”
We all know that no one deserves anything (least of all money they haven’t saved and retirement), so why are we thinking that it’s the company or the government who has to hand you a job on a silver platter?
It’s like saying that you spent your whole working life screwing around with your money, going into thousands of dollars in debt, only to find at the age of 65 that the bank is telling you that you CAN’T stop working or retire because you have nothing saved and you owe them a lot of money.
Are you going to go to the bank and whine that they should not only clear your debts for you, but give you money to retire?
Are you going to argue that you deserved all those fancy vacations they paid for on your behalf because you worked so hard and needed a treat?
Or that your brand new car is a necessity because you hate public transportation, what with all those people crammed into a space making you feel like cattle?
The job market is essentially the same, brutal reality.
If you want more money, and you know what job you want, but that job requires skills you don’t have, are you going to storm into that company, and throw a fit saying:
Look, it’s not really my responsibility to learn new skills, go to school, and work hard.
It’s the company and the government’s job to give me what I want because I was BORN here.
I’m educated with a degree. It should be good enough for you to overlook the fact that I don’t have the skills you need.
Sounds ridiculous right?
4. Why are skilled immigrants such a supposed threat to the country?
Outsourcing is not only happening because of cost. It’s 90% of the reason, but it’s also that they (presumably) do the job faster and better.
As an immigrant twice over, I always get a distinct feeling (partially a stereotype really), that society believes that immigrants simply work harder because they don’t have this I Deserve mentality.
They know what it took to get into a First World country for a better life for their family, and they don’t expect anyone to give them anything.
It’s the survival of the fittest… and for their children — the hardest working and the smartest.
Their motto is: Who is going to pay your bills if you don’t hustle?
I was watching the most recent episode of Project Runway (Episode 3, Season 10), where Elena Silvnyak from the Ukraine gets annoyed when another designer tells her to calm down and doesn’t understand why she’s so intense.
Being from where I am [Ukraine], you need a toughness to survive.
If you go to the Ukraine, no one is going to say ‘Please’ and ‘Thank you’ and bla bla bla.
To just survive and eat everyday, people have to really hustle.
You have to be very strong. The weak ones don’t survive.
I haven’t had to ever live in that kind of extreme, but I see her point.
Without a stream of skilled immigrants, could this country continue to grow and thrive? No.
Without people (never mind where you’re from), who work hard and get the job done, would this country be as dynamic as it is? No.
So why do we want to NOT challenge ourselves as a society, and instead, want to blame others for setting the bar too high?
Want to do something about it? Be better at your job. Work harder. Learn more. Adapt and outsmart the others around you.
5. Where are displaced Americans going to get the skills?
Okay, so if we’ve come to the conclusion that Americans don’t have manufacturing jobs available any longer, then they need to find other kinds of jobs they can do.
However, someone who has been a factory worker assembling parts for 40 years, is not likely going to be able to transition into a more complex job that requires more skills without getting a basic education.
It can be hard to go back to school at the age of 50 to try and learn something you haven’t grown up with.
It can be twice as hard to do this, when you haven’t saved enough for retirement because you expected that a company would take care of you, are unemployed and simply cannot do the job required.
(Not as a slight against anyone’s brain or skills, it’s more that it’s like the old adage goes — It is really hard to teach an old dog, new tricks)
Perhaps the answer is not to give jobs by forcing patriotism down people’s throats, or patronizing (and CODDLING) the workforce, but to offer higher education at more affordable rates and to encourage people into jobs that WILL pay.
6. Are we setting up our future generations for such jobs and to have a sense of competition?
There are some things you just can’t teach, and some people who just can’t learn.
You can’t teach me anything about chemistry — it just.. gives me a headache, and I simply don’t want to learn it mostly because I am not interested in it.
I’m going to take a wild guess that this is the same for most people.
So the problem is getting people to be interested in learning and doing jobs that are needed by the American market, today.
Instead, what I think I am feeling is that society is coddling everyone around them well into adulthood and it starts when they’re kids.
“You can do and be anything you want, my precious darling!
You are the most unique snowflake in the world who is brilliant at everything.
OMG look, you learned how to spit up so adorably.“
This makes kids realize that any little thing they do, get praised, so why bother challenging themselves or reaching higher?
This same attitude continues as they get older.
They just need to make a half-assed try at something to be told how awesome they are, then they’re surprised when employers are not impressed with their mediocre skills.
It also makes kids want to only do fun things. Like coloring. And napping.
Who the hell wants to learn math as a kid? Or study science?
Okay, so there are a few zealous geeks who started young, but the majority of kids dream about being ballerinas, singers, actresses and athletes.
They see the fame, the fortune.. and it’s COOL because their idols do it.
No one dreams about becoming an engineer.
So maybe you don’t want to go all Lion Father or Tiger Mother on them, but the bar should be set a little higher or else they’ll really be ill-prepared for the future job market.
SUMMARY:
- Outsourcing results from people & companies make choices for their budgets
- Companies play on that patriotism of: Buy American Made!
- Is it a company or a government’s duty to give you a job?
- Why are skilled immigrants overseas or in the country such a threat to society?
- Where are displaced Americans going to get new jobs and find new skills?
- Are we setting up our future kids, or hurting them?
I am open to all kinds of (CIVIL) opinions and discussions as I haven’t made up my mind totally and am struggling through with these thoughts I’ve laid out above.
I am also clearly biased (who isn’t?) based on my situation.
What do you think about the above?
Why aren’t Asian guys dating Caucausian girls?
Absolutely Fobulous posted a great video on this, about Asian guys getting perplexed as to why Caucasian girls don’t date them in the same numbers as Asian girls date Caucasian guys.
NOT 100% CULTURAL, I THINK
The video says it’s because it’s cultural.
They can’t understand the things each other grew up with, and what they experienced because it’s so different.
Even the way they date and what they look for in the opposite sex is different — Chairman Mao had something to say about this:
But I’m going to come right out and say that this is probably not 100% of the truth.
I mean, look at all the foreign guys in general, ones from Europe for instance.
Bridget, I’m looking at you!, even though you are 50% German
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“The reality that I find every German man between the ages of 20 and 40 attractive. Especially when they’re walking around Frankfurt in their gorgeous business suits looking so… German. “
They have accents, different cultural experiences and don’t grow up in the same environments either.
They have insane tests like in Asia, far, FAR harder than what I’ve ever experienced here, and when they talk about not having boyfriends or girlfriends JUST SO they can study to get into the best schools, I get this clueless look on my face, tinged with fear for their schooling system.
Anyway, if culture was the case, it doesn’t explain the phenomenal amount of Asian girls (North-American-born or otherwise), dating Caucasian men in droves.
DEPENDS ON WHO YOU GREW UP WITH TOO
One of the factors not mentioned, is simply that North American girls in general, are attracted to who they’ve grown up with — namely, Caucasian guys.
If they grew up with Asian guys, these girls would probably be attracted to them too.
Perhaps if Caucasian women went to Asia to study, it’d be the reverse.
…OR MAYBE IT’S THE SEXES
Maybe guys are just less picky in general and are really more open to dating all types as long as they are living, breathing, and most importantly — have boobs and girly curves
(That last crack was for you, Nelson)
Thoughts on interracial dating?
Posted in Life
Also tagged Asian Men, Asian Women, Cultures, Dating, Interracial Dating, Men, Why, Women
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